Don't Let Booty Do Happen to You

My daughter is now 1 year old and fully weaned, so my appetite and mood are now within my control for at least 20 days a month. Operation Stripper Body has resumed as a necessary measure against my personal Taliban attack AKA Booty Do. 

What is Booty Do, you ask?

Booty Do (n.): an urban expression which describes the condition that occurs when  a woman's abdomen is so engorged with fat that it extends in imbalanced ratio to her derrière, I.E. her stomach pokes out more than her booty do(es).

I was able to live like I was not in danger of being a victim to this disorder, but after weaning my baby, my Dolly Parton knockers are gone, and my hour glass looks more like an egg. 

I'm not doing as bad as some, but I need to be restored to my former glory! 

On that note, this is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.