Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Jahi McMath

The vibrant 13 year old in the picture was declared brain dead after a surgery went south.  Despite her mother's pleas for the life of her daughter, the obvious signs of life were dismissed.
You can read the full story here.

Though the overturning of the ruling sets a precedent, Jahi will never have the chance to grow up.  I know there is some solace in knowing this never has to happen to another child, but it has to hurt knowing her child was capable of living but denied a chance.

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Monday, October 6, 2014

Kelly Rowland is Preggers!

http://blackamericaweb.com/2014/10/06/kelly-rowland-teams-up-with-lance-gross-for-pregancy-shoot-photos/

Kelly is sexy and she knows it! Check the pics....

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Hot Mama Zoe Saldana

Who is that hot preggo? Oh, that's just Zoe Saldana and her future twins! I need to get my shit together. That is all I think about when I see her being all hot and graceful with more than one baby on board. Check out the pics! http://hellobeautiful.com/2014/10/02/zoe-saldana-in-christian-dior-academy-of-motion-picture-arts-and-sciences-hollywood-costume-opening-party/

Monday, September 29, 2014

Fertility Miracles

http://blackdoctor.org/playlist/black-celebrities-with-fertility-issues/item/449286/

Justice Over Everything

http://blackamericaweb.com/2014/09/28/michael-browns-parents-want-arrest-not-apology/

The Ferguson, MO shooting death of unarmed, college-bound teen Michael Brown has exposed the dominant society for what it really represents.  I am a mother of one, and I hope to have more, so I am following this story because it affects me and my future kids. I am Black before anything else. I could say I am human first, but I am a descendant of diaspora. My race has been dehumanized from the beginning of our journey to this country.
I am proud to see protesters sticking it out for real change instead of accepting the Pyrrhic victory. We don't need another memorial. We need the slave drivers called cops to know there is no refuge for killing our kids. We need the anonymous racists on Go Fund Me and other sites to have their donations withheld from these societal villains.  We need what we want, not some phony media stunt in between murders.

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Have A Baby: The Surprising Benefits

http://www.womenshealthmag.com/life/want-kids-sooner?utm_source=zergnet.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=zergnet_244803&cid=partner_zergnet

Friday, September 12, 2014

Friday, September 5, 2014

Your Baby Can't Read

The recent  exposing of the Your Baby Can Read product raises awareness to some fundamental flaws in teaching/training children. 

The program, which boasted a success rate based on research that frankly never happened, is a result of sequencing. 

Children are sponges.  Some are brilliant enough to comprehend the training at an earlier age than most, but many are merely mimicking a pattern.  Horses can be trained to "count", which usually means they can remember pictures and follow verbal and nonverbal cues to respond to a command as opposed to answering questions.

A way to ensure you are not simply teaching a parlor trick to your child is to make a relationship between the information and its application.

I use flashcards to teach my daughter numbers.  I also make her count objects.  She doesnt count large numbers of objects since we work with 1-20, but she understands she has 2 shoes, or 3 rocks.  She understands a $20 bill is more than a $1 bill (and she will ask for a $20 bill). 

Letters are a different battle.  I would like to teach her phonics, since that was the method I learned to read with, but I dont know if she has the focus to learn phonics as of yet.  Without phonics, letters are just pictures, and picture reading is reading without comprehension.

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Monday, August 11, 2014

Baby Weight a*k*a Operation Kill Chocolate Thunder

I am posting this picture of me 2 months postpartum.  I was 20 lbs down and feeling myself.  My weight has gone up and down since then, mostly due to the pressure I have put on myself to finish my Rosetta Stone Spanish courses before 2014 ends.  I have a free gym membership at my local university, and I will be starting my days early with cardio.  Not only will I improve my health, but I will also have some "me time" (what the hell is that? Lol) and some TV time that doesn't include Sesame Street.
Until next time, this is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Potty Strike

My beautiful toddler is about 78% potty trained, but she regresses sometimes.  I notice she only breaks away from her training when we are at home.  She does well at the library and the grocery store, but she will have an "accident" right BEFORE bed and AFTER peeing on the potty.

I am being vigilant. I was informed I fuss too much, so I have decided on using an authoritative tone accompanied by positive or negative reinforcement by providing or withdrawing toys or the Kindle to yield a desired outcome. 
But sometimes I get frustrated and fuss.
At least I know she has bladder and bowel control. I just dont like the idea that she may be using her powers for evil.
That is all for now.  This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Meanings in Cartoon Movies

Ted and Tedx never disappoint!
I love the in-depth analysis.  I hope you enjoy.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Saturday, May 31, 2014

Parenting Fails

No one is perfect, and the obvious isn't obvious to everyone.  Click the link to see some of the foolishness.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing.

115.jpg
How did the parents let this happen?

Friday, May 30, 2014

Reading Rainbow Is Back

1380159_711665868871740_8100205230610592517_n.jpg
Now my child will know the joys of great storytelling followed by the disappointment of the story ending abruptly with if you want to read more, go to your local library. 
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off. 

Monday, May 26, 2014

Monster In Law


url.jpg

I am not married, but I am in a committed relationship, and his mother is a bitch  hell on wheels.  I am not an expert on how to deal.  I have dealt poorly in the past, and when I know she is coming over for a surprise visit, I immediately become MASSIVELY depressed and pray it doesn't last long.
She is  so nasty and so rude *NeNe voice* and she is religious to boot.  Most of all, she has done some specific things to rub me the wrong way.  The offenses are as follows:
1. Baby Shower Invites
This succubus lady was in charge of two things for my shower: securing a venue and sending invitations.  She not only did not get a venue in time, she sent the invitations out so late, my family was not represented at all.
2.  Babysitting Fail
She was supposed to watch our daughter for one night.  Not only did she drive an hour to bring the baby back, the asshole imbecile child of God honked the horn in the parking lot of the apartment complex at 3:00 AM.  Even her husband mentioned the baby had been sleep majority of the drive.  The sad thing is she is such a jealous, angry and miserable person, she is upset every time the baby spends time around any other grandparents.  She is even jealous of my daughter's gifts and attention.

As you can see, not only do I dislike her with good reason, I am not looking to find common ground.  I really don't care if I get along with crazy people.  I just thank God we are moving and will be in a lot less contact with her.  I am looking to make myself as scarce as possible when she does visit.

*update: 5/27/2014 It has been brought to my attention this person may be in my life to teach me unconditional love.  You only strengthen your ability to love difficult people by loving them.  That's my balance for the day.*

Sorry for the lack of happy happy joy joy.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Octomom Welfare Fraud Case


1391650921000-AP-Octomom-Welfare-Fraud.jpg


Before you ask, yes, Octomom is still alive.  Nadya Suleman plead "not guilty" in her case of welfare fraud in March.  
It's not really about the possibility of fraud for me, but it is about the fact that she did not parlay her media exposure into a lucrative business.  I just think she should have been a fitness guru/dietician/author/expert on time management/ etc.  She should have sold the rest of her soul and told us how she stays fit and what she does to keep from going nuts.  She should have reinvented her persona for the world.  Instead, she had 14 kids to satisfy her lonely inner child and is on assistance. 
She could be doing 6+ years in jail if she is found guilty, unless she pays back the tens of thousands of dollars she has received.
Yikes.
These are just my opinions.  This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off. 

Black-ish - Trailer

Lesbian Parenthood

Screen-shot-2011-11-21-at-11.01.59-AM.png
I am always intrigued by the journeys of same-sex parents.  I have witnessed a same sex relationship that involved children, and if the alternative lifestyle was not a given in the beginning of a child's life, it is much more difficult for them to adapt, in my observation.  These couples, however, are now looking for acknowledgement as parents on actual birth certificates as opposed to legal guardianship.  This is an interesting concept, considering the fact that unless a member of the same sex couple uses a family member as a conduit or sperm donor for parenthood, the child would only be biologically related to one parent.
I just thought this was interesting.  This is Realest Mother Dearest signing out. 

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Pregnancy Confessions

tumblr_n52o396qHm1tw28avo1_500.jpg
Hey all,
   I just wanted to talk about this neat tumbler I stumbled upon (http://pregnancy-confessions.tumblr.com) and let you all know I am still blogging, but mostly on hub pages.  I will continue to keep up with this site, but mostly I will be on the hub.  I write about any and everything over there, so check it out.
This is Realest Mother Dearest, signing off.

Monday, April 14, 2014

How Far Would You Go to Provide for Your Kids?

mimi-faust-sex-tape.jpg
If you recall, I blogged about Mimi Faust and her abandonment issues stemming from her mother.  If you follow the Love and Hip Hop series you know she underwent cosmetic surgery on her breast, which she revealed during the show.  Now that she has a new relationship, her fiancé and her have cut a lucrative deal with Vivid, a well-known porn company, and are releasing their "sex tape".  Now that she is no longer with her promiscuous and manipulative sperm donor, she has turned to this option as a revenue stream.  Ladies, what would you do in this situation? Do you feel her decision was really warranted? 
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off. 

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Itunes Refunds for Child Purchases

iTunes just issued a policy update which allows you to request refunds on apps purchased by your little ones without your permission.  Just thought I would share.
Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Fatherhood, a Documentary ALL Parents Can Learn From

I know Mother's Day comes first, but do not let the title fool you.  Although Frank Azaria, voice actor for the animated series , "The Simpsons", takes the angle of fatherhood, the panel of experts and fellow fathers share advice and anecdotes about parenting which could be of use to any parent.   
The 12-part series spans a few years.  Although Azaria intended to use the documentary to investigate parenting and whether or not he wanted to embark on the journey, his girlfriend became pregnant, and we are able to watch his son, Hal, from the beginning.  
From having a premature son (10 weeks early!) to teaching an only child to socialize with others because the whole world doesn't revolve around him anymore, we get to see how Azaria and others deal with each phase.  Heavier subjects such as death and God are even discussed.
It took some doing but I completed all 12 segments, and I feel it is worth the time.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Child Abuse Awareness

        imgres.jpg       
         I'm not going to go into the gory details of the latest viral video of a man beating his daughter for disappearing for 3 days as well as wearing a slip of a dress in public.  If you are interested, you can watch it here.   I'm also not about to make you gag at the mother of 5 who was imprisoned for neglecting her children in filth, but if you are curious you can click here. What I will say is, it's easy to look at such an obvious outlier such as public abuse and say "that's not right" but there are other forms of abuse that are dismissed every day.
          April is Child Abuse Prevention Month, and here are some signs of abuse.  Hopefully if you are guilty of some these behaviors your will seek help.  Psychology Today categorizes child abuse as physical, emotional, verbal or sexual.  The abuse can be the result of neglect.
         I often find myself engaging in thought-provoking conversation about what is acceptable in the way of chastisement for children.  It is hard to know at times if you are doing the right thing for those with older children, but if you don't understand what abuse is, you will exact it on your child, thinking the ends justifies the means.  Verbal abuse is more than just a firm tone of voice; it is berating a child into obedience.  I have witnessed parents using this tactic and I always want to say something but parenting is such a sensitive subject I refuse to volunteer information.  Embarrassing your child in front of his or her friends about a bedwetting problem with not help them get over it any faster, especially if bedwetting comes from a lack of emotional security.
         If there is anything I can say about these horrific tales of neglect and abuse, I would like to say be careful with your words and actions, even in moments of extreme anger.  A child's wrongdoing is not an opportunity to hand out whatever punishment comes to mind.  A heavy hand only provokes wrath after so long.
     
        This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Wi-Fi and Children's Health


search.jpg

As I type this entry, I am using the Wi-Fi in my home.  I am in an apartment, and there are several nearby Wi-Fi ignals.  Each signal carries its own, albeit low, radiation, and although the research on Wi-Fi and health is inconclusive, many people are complaining of a myriad of symptoms ranging from headaches to difficult sleeping.  Some schools ban the use of Wi-Fi in the interest of sparing children from the potentially harmful effects.

The debate still rages on, but I know personally, some of my close friends as well as myself have experienced symptoms that seem to disappear when the wifi is disabled or the ethernet cable is employed instead.  Here are some suggestions to consider when at home:

  • Disable the Wi-Fi when it is not in use. 
  • Disable the Wi-Fi habitually before bedtime.  
  • Limit your use of Wi-Fi during the day, i.e., allow yourself so much time for frivolous games and Facebook, then find other things to do.

After you have done these things for about a week, document how you feel, how your children behave, and how your sleep patterns are affected.  You may be surprised.  There is another claim that plants cannot thrive near wireless routers, which is troubling to say the least.

Investigate for yourself, and tell me what you think.  This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Career Shifts

         Since my daughter came into my life, a lot of issues in this society have come to the forefront of my mind.  One such issue is how kid unfriendly American society seems to be.  From the time that little pee stick turned blue, I sought employment with the awareness that employers do not like pregnant women.

        You can read up on this and other issues in The Shriver Report which features articles by everyday mothers from all over the country as well as superstar mom Beyonce.

                                                        ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il.jpg     
       This experience got me to thinking: how can I get my career going so I can have the money and time to be a good mom?  As a childless adult, it was easy to just pull a double shift or get a second job when I wanted to pay down a debt or take a trip.  With a child things are a little more complicated.  You can't trust all of your family members to do things properly, and those who will are not always free to look after your little ones.  
        I decided to make myself a more worthy candidate in the job market by becoming fluent in Spanish with the Rosetta Stone program.
                                                        ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_til.jpg       
         It is at a discount right now, but I'm not sure for how long.  The program is downloadable on up to 5 devices, which is perfect for a busy mom like myself.  Also, bilingual jobs are in high demand, since the Spanish-speaking populace has grown more than ever before in the U.S., making it a good choice for me.  Many jobs pay $1 more an hour for entry-level bilingual employees.  The program claims I can be fluent in 6 months if I complete a 30 minute course every day.  To be fair, I am breezing through the first of 5 lessons because I took (and passed!) Spanish in college.  I will keep you guys posted on my experience, but so far so good.

      This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Comment below on how your approach to career goals changed after you had a child.


Friday, March 14, 2014

Breast Is Best

Breastfeeding is the most natural option to feed a child, and it is stirring up controversy yet again.Ashley-Nicole-Instagram.png.CROP_.rtstoryvar-large.png
The mother pictured above is Ashley Nicole, and she is the girlfriend of Miami Dolphin's linebacker Phillip Wheeler.  Her photo went viral on Instagram because her exposed breast was deemed inappropriate by some.  
The world is so upside down and backwards.  How is is that a woman breastfeeding is disgusting but drinking cow's milk is normalized?  I'm confused.
I won't draw out the subject since a lot of my sentiments are expressed in Demetria L. Lucas' blog on The Root website.  

Tell me what you think.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off. 

Thursday, March 6, 2014

HERBAL Birth Control???

ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il.jpg
Have y'all ever heard of herbal birth control???
I first found out about this option while incorporating turmeric into my diet as a detox assist.  I research all supplements, because even thought they are from the earth, so is poison ivy.  That is when I discovered it is to be avoided during pregnancy and nursing, and it is said to be a natural birth control.  According to the healthy home economist, there are several herbs that aid in safely delaying pregnancy without the risks commonly associated with mainstream birth control such as breast cancer, osteoporosis and sterility.  Here are some examples.  I am not a doctor folks, and I am not aware of the dosing, so do your own research.

ref=as_li_tf_il.jpg
This site and others suggest using Queen Anne's Lace as an herbal supplement to prevent pregnancy.  It is said to have been highly effective in the olden days, and the herb is one of the two plants that yielded the hybrid we know today as the carrot (the other plant is the sweet potato).

ref=as_li_tf_il.jpg

Neem oil is another natural birth control remedy.  This oil boasts hair growth properties as well as a potent spermicidal lubricant.  On the other hand, it is said to have a potent and offensive aroma, so try at your own risk.  I don't want to smell like a garbage pail kid, especially not during sex.

There are many more interesting herbs listed for such use, so look into it and seek the advice of a seasoned holistic practitioner if you are sincerely interested in making herbal birth control part of your lifestyle.  Comment below if you or someone you know is already doing so.  This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Amazon Prime Streaming Selection for Kids


ref=sr_1_1.jpg          ref=sr_1_1.jpg         ref=sr_1_1.jpg      ref=sr_1_13.jpg



Little BillGullah Gullah Island, and other defunct educational programs may no longer be in rotation on television, but Amazon Prime offers several seasons of these classic, diverse programs for children to those who are members.  For $79 a year, many shows that were favorites of mine as well as my niece are now available to my daughter.  The emphasis on education in current programming is wonderful, but the cultural emphasis leaves much to be desired.  In addition to free two-day shipping on all orders, there is a library of family program that you are not privy to from Hulu Plus or Netflix.
Look into some of the programs you may have loved as a child offered in their extensive library.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Please comment below on topics you are interested in.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

That Ain't Love, Love!


Valentine's Day has passed, and mine was lovely!  I hope you all had a good one, but for those who may be having hard times, I felt compelled to post a video from one of my favorite vloggers, Jerry Lavigne Jr.  While he is more notably recognized as a YouTube comedian, this past summer he opened up about having to take anger management due to an argument he had with his girlfriend, which led to police being called.
His story is an important one, because while he did not physically harm anyone, there are many forms of abuse, and he has come to understand that intimidation through yelling or property damage is just as unacceptable.
Learn the signs of abuse, and if the person you are with is not willing to get help, GET OUT!
Seek counsel from services established in your area.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Take care of yourselves.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Beyonce and the Peek-a-Boo Baby

imgres.jpg
You ever notice how Beyonce only kinda sorta shows Blue's face?  I mean she put her in a video and whatnot, but she doesn't really hyper expose her to the social media networks.

I think that is commendable. 

Well I do now, that is.

When my daughter was first born, I was so ecstatic about her arrival, I was ready to flood timelines the world over, and I kinda did.  I even gave a classmate from college permission to use her as a model for her site (she is a photographer).  It wasn't until my parents were uncomfortable that I even considered slowing down in the photographs.  I don't agree with all of the things my parents used to do, but I was really struck by a statement my father made when I had her ears pierced.  

He said, "You don't know if she wanted earrings.  You should have let her make her own choice when she got older."

I honestly didn't see it that way.  I was just making a cute baby even cuter in my eyes, but I decided he had made a broader point.  Children are subjected to the highs and lows of whatever life their parents have, and have no control.  What I took away from his statement was to be mindful of choices I am making on her behalf, even as it pertains to image.  I get that there are pedophiles and kidnappers, but what about the voiceless child who has no control and no idea of the consequences?

I still post a picture ever so often, but I'm definitely not as enthusiastic as I once was.

*tips hat to Beyonce*

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Stay tuned. 

Healthy Body Image

Remember Lilo and Stitch?
More specifically, the big sister, Nani Pelekai ?

url.jpg

I remember I was excited to see her in this film, and I was so ecstatic to see her beautiful round nose and full hips, thick thighs and strong calfs.  She was princess worthy to me, though I realized she wouldn't be a princess because she wasn't a lead character.

I am always in search of healthy images to surround my daughter with so the world won't be able to shake her view of herself as an undeniably beautiful girl, and the image above is one that will be in her room soon.

What are your thoughts on more ethnic cartoon images? 

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.   

Breast Feeding Side Effects

imgres.jpg
While I was pregnant with my daughter, I had a mentor of sorts at my job who advised me on ways to make childbirth go smoothly.  Her name was Carlisa, and she was a manager and mother of three, all of whom she delivered naturally.  Obviously I asked her questions every chance I got!
When I informed her of my choice to breastfeed, she told me it was not even an option for her.  She said that area was so sensitive she would be aroused, which was weird, so she chose to pump.  I didn't think I would have that problem. 

Then one day I was breast feeding in bed and while I dozed off, I had an orgasm. 

I was jolted out of my sleep by it. 

come to find out, other women have experienced this and even worse.  Orgasmic birth, for instance, seems a lot better than typical birth, but I would really be emotionally perplexed for weeks if something like that happened.  

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Please comment below if you have had a similar experience.

Squeeze the Grape(s)


ref=sr_1_1.jpg

If you have not heard of ben wa balls and you have given birth, you should really consider investigating them.  The little silver grape-sized balls pictured above are not sex toys but a tool to help women strengthen or rebuild their kegel muscles.   I know what you're thinking: this HAS to be something invented by men, right?

While having a strong pelvic floor is definitely going to make sex more pleasurable for the guy in your life, the more important issues addressed by these exercises are incontinence as well as the possibility of uterine prolapse in the future.  I am from the country, so for those who have heard an older lady say "my p*ssy fell out", you know a women with extremely weak pelvic muscles, and unless you just want your uterus to one day come out and say "Hi!", ben wa balls are a tool worth investing in.

So why stuff metal in your lady parts? Why not just hold and release the muscles at every stoplight?

While these efforts are wonderful, the beauty of the ben wa balls is you can gauge your progress.  You want to use these tools when you are cleaning your house or doing floor exercises indoors.  At first the balls will slide out of you, but as your strength increases, you will hold the weights inside.

We are an advanced society, and since we aren't doing outdoor chores or balancing jugs on our heads, we have to manufacture ways to work out.  The pelvic floor needs attention.  If you plan on having another child (or two) you will be stronger the next time around.

Also, do not think for a second that a c-section makes you irrelevant to this conversation.  All mothers released hormones during pregnancy that led to the softening of joints and widening of hips in preparation of the bringing forth of life, and the joints and muscles were affected whether you pushed out Mini Me or not.

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Stay tuned.  I am going to be writing more consistently, so those prizes I promised forever ago will happen people!

Monday, February 10, 2014

Women, Keep Your Uterus!



DISCLAIMER: I am not saying this video is an example of what I am doing personally, nor am I endorsing the products or services mentioned.  I just agree with the main points of healing yourself and keeping your lady parts.

As a first-time mother, I am having conversations about feminine health with my elders that I have not had before, and the amount of women I know who have elected to have their uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes, etc. removed is astounding.  What's worse is these 40+ year old women lack the understanding of their bodies that would allow them to see the dire consequences of ridding themselves of offal.  I  only know 1 person who had a hysterectomy because of cancer.  These women are so glad to be period free, they don't realize their abdominal support is in jeopardy of prolapse.
These lucrative surgeries are now discussed with greedy physicians as a first choice instead of a last resort.  60 years ago the idea of having the uterus removed was uncommon and unacceptable to most women, and now the new generations of middle aged women are singing the surgeon's praises!
My plea is a simple one: before you go under the knife, research and count the costs.  Don't just do a Google search and read some posts.  Speak with people who are willing to give you a true account of what changes occurred.  Menstrual cycles are a pain, but the creator is not flawed.  If the organ is removed and is not immediately threatening your life, the surgery will not be a total win.
This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.  Please comment below if you have had or considered having a hysterectomy.  I want to know your thoughts, people!

A Father Examines Manhood



I am a huge fan of Ted Talks, and this particular lecture made me tear up.  Tony Porter gives a very candid account of what it means to be a man as well as how detrimental the "man box" is to men as well as women.  The lack of freedom in manhood is a big contributor to the abuse and degradation of women based on his theory.  The most poignant statement he made was in reference to how he wants to make a better world for his daughter by shaping mental attitudes in males.  Please listen to and share this video.

This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Saturday, February 8, 2014

Fox's Bill O'Reilly: Pregnant Black Women are a Menace To Society!



As an educated unwed mother rearing a daughter with an active father, I would like to say Bill O'Reilly needs to quit with the jokes.  His shock jock foolery at the expense of Black people (women this time) is frankly boring.  And only a weak man picks on women anyway.

Since I have my preface out of the way, I would also like to mention how weary I am of the criminalization of HUMAN behaviors executed by BLACK people.  Whether the story is about teenage pregnancy or the death of an innocent Black boy in his father's neighborhood, it seems that when a white member of American society commits a crime, there is either a 1) a plausible reason if it is a white female, 2) drugs or molestation if it is a white male or 3) typical shenanigans of a youth if you are referring to teens or those in their early 20s.  This is my opinion, by the way, so feel free to submit input/research/rebuttals below.  In the end, it seems the darker your skin, the worse your intent.  There is no real concern for the person's background, and regaining respectability as well as socioeconomic stability is twice as difficult and half as respected.

These types of topics irk me mostly because of the lack of perspective held by his type of audience, which is a group of narrow minded and influential persons who did not need more motivation against minorities.  That bear has been poke enough!  When you consider how population control was disguised as sexual health assistance through the formation of Planned Parenthood, it is important to make sure Black procreation is as vile as possible in the eye of the media.  Meanwhile back in the suburbs, shows like 16 and Pregnant perpetuate the idea that the low and middle class, white unwed mothers not only need help, but are more so deserving of the help.  Do not be fooled: the suggestion that Planned Parenthood was to prevent infant mortality as well as promote prudence and health for the mothers is a ruse.  These issues were not in the Black community, so issues had to be trumped up to create cause for such and organization, plus services were free or dirt cheap, and racial tensions were high.  No one was too keen on the idea of allowing someone who wouldn't pee in the same toilet access to their reproductive organs.  At least not at first.

Well this is Realest Mother Dearest signing off. Stay tuned for more topics, and feel free to suggest topics below.

In my Africa + Lryics (song heard on Arthur about the 54 countries in Af...





It is Black History Month, and this singular show has made me so proud I was moved to tears.  I watched Hey Arthur even when I was at an age when it definitely did not cater to my demographic, but when I saw this episode for the first time yesterday, I thought to myself, finally! I watched it with my one year old baby, and even though she is not at an age to understand the significance, I was so happy to see a beautiful Africa.  Every place has a ghetto, and Feed the Children commercials are a big reason the stereotype of Africa is poverty.  Africa needs Jesus and food, let the infomercial tell it, and at the end of the day, the snippet has played so often for so many years it is the accepted subconscious truth in the minds of Americans.  This clip is the highlight of the show, but the entire episode was beautiful, and I learned a thing or two!  I definitely thought of the continent as a place on the bucket list to visit for educational purposes, but the pictures and descriptions create an image of a pleasurable experience for tourists.  It is my hope that one day, in my lifetime, the beauty of Africa will be ranked with (or above) other lush tourist stops such as Hawaii.  Enjoy this clip and share it with your children and friends. This is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Baby Hair

Hey, it's been a minute and I haven't kept up but it's frankly because I'm busy and my layout sorta sucks currently, but that will change soon.  My daughter finally has enough hair to style, and it's really manageable too (thank GAWD) but I don't really know what I'm doing. I hoped for a boy for this reason.  I seriously was looking forward to cutting hair.  What's worse is my mother went to beauty school before she was even thinking about having a daughter, and she can literally do any hairstyle.  When I was a kid I had crazy cornrows designs with colorful beads a la Crooklyn.  So I get to hear speeches when I visit.  
I hope I figure some cute stuff out that can be done with little outside help, but I doubt it. I have even tried watching YouTube videos over and over.  My hands don't really translate what my eyes see.
Whelp, this is Realest Mother Dearest signing off.